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You may have heard of a doula and the benefits they provide.
In case you haven’t, doulas are essentially support persons who have been trained and have dedicated their lives to supporting families during pregnancy, birth, and postpartum.
Many people have come to believe that doulas are necessities at every birth, but I disagree. Click To TweetToday I will let you know some of the reason why I believe you don’t have to hire a doula.
- You are taking a childbirth class that is giving you comfort and confidence. Labor is a scary time and is a time where anything goes. You don’t know what will work and you don’t know what will happen. Being prepared and comfortable and confident in knowing what can change and how to cope with changes are one of the top skills you need in childbirth. If you are taking a class, or reading books, or watching videos…or really however you are learning, if you feel comfortable and confident now, you don’t need a doula.
*Note: LC Maternity offers a Comfort Techniques class for Las Cruces.
- You have a strong support team already. Some people don’t want a crowd at their births, and sometimes having their significant other, a doula, and the group of nurses and care providers at a standard hospital birth, can feel like a crowd. You don’t have to have that. If you don’t care how many people are there as long as they are helping you, then pick the people who are there to help you and you feel confident in their ability to do so. That can be your mother, sister, cousin, partner, friend, whomever. As long as your team knows what you want and how they can support you, you don’t need a doula.
- You would rather spend the money elsewhere. Honestly doulas need to be paid. This is a hard job they are doing and it can take them away for an unknown amount of time from their families and/or other life responsibilities. Depending on what the investment is in your area (every area is slightly different but they all seem to have a wide range of pricing points) you may just not want to spend that amount of money on a doula and that is okay. Go enjoy massages. Go out for a last vacation before baby comes. Pay your bills ahead of time to account for time taken off of work post-baby. Go buy more diapers. Splurge on a high quality car seat. Save it for a postpartum doula (maybe). Whatever you want, if you have the money but you don’t want to use it on a doula, you don’t have to.
- And last, you just don’t want one. A doula is not for every person, family, birth, etc. We, as doulas, understand this. If you don’t want a doula, you don’t need to hire one.
None of this is to discount the amazing work that professional doulas do. They are great additions to birth teams and can help you feel better and more confident about your birth. If you find yourself having fears or doubts about your birth or labor, call up some doulas, interview them, find the doula that connects with you, your birth team, and supports you and your decisions, then pay them and have their support.
They are amazing but you don’t have to have one.
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One response
Well said. Indeed doulas may be helpful but not necessary. Bradley Method or BirthForMen for instance, they train and equip men or dads to become the doula. In the first place, Adam is the first doula, a man. Men are important during childbirth. They have a unique role, and they know their partners well enough for their physical and emotional needs.